Read more →
Wanting to avoid Sunday rushes in shopping areas we decided that we would explore the area in which we are currently staying, Koto. Luckily there are tons of pretty shrines all around Tokyo so we walked around for a while looking for food and old buildings. Sunday well spent.Read more →
Apparently it hasn’t snowed in Tokyo in 54 years so it came as quite the surprise to us when we woke on our first day and there was snow everywhere. Instead of being sensible and taking the subway out for the day we decided it was a good idea to walk an hour and a half in the snow and rain to Yumenoshima Greenhouse which was beautiful and warm. Unfortunately we had to cut the day short after taking the train into Chiyoda and went home to our adorable little apartment.
Read more →
While being held back from something you love is hard, it won’t last forever. I trained to be a professional ballerina from the ages of three to sixteen. Classical ballet was for a while my entire life and giving up on it as a dream was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. It happened gradually and then all at once the pain I was experiencing from over strain and structural imperfections forced me to stop dancing. While I felt extremely lost and angry, time really did heal. I know this is something that hundreds of thousands of hopeful dancers have to go through due to injury or rejection and I hope even if only one person reads this and feels better I would feel so fulfilled.
I spent a year of my life doing nothing. My time was spent playing video games and working on my degree. I completely lost my appetite becoming quite thin and lost my will to move or exercise. Though that does sound rather depressing I was starting to distract myself, I was no longer thinking sad thoughts. Towards the end of 2015 I moved out of my parents house into a flat in Auckland. While I am a little embarrassed to admit this, I certainly do not regret beginning to date one of my flatmates whom I am still currently with. Him and his family were very athletic and while I had never considered myself a runner in the past I started running a lot which I absolutely loved. I began playing sports which I enjoyed from a competitive level which aligned with my dance mentality and I started to really improve my fitness. I gained a lot of weight as I started eating again out of happiness which I didn’t love from an aesthetic perspective but knew was much healthier than how I had been living previously.
Unfortunately I was starting to notice some issues. My fitness had increased and I could run further than I ever had, however the pain I had always assumed was normal in the low part of my leg was holding me back from being about to push myself further. I spoke to my boyfriends father who is a doctor and after explaining all of my symptoms I learned that feeling pain on a day to day basis was not normal(this may sound crazy to some). I get pain in my calves when I leisurely walk up hills. It has been like that since I was a child and I have learned to live with it. Until now I had not thought of it as abnormal and I had certainly never complained about it to anyone. The pain I was experiencing seemed to be getting much worse, I had to stop running and playing any sports. I decided to go and see someone about it and was referred onto a sports physician. I was yet again confirmed that what I was experiencing in my legs was indeed very abnormal. It was relieving and surprising at the same time and I began to wonder how I had gone for so many years assuming that everyone felt what I felt!
The first thing to test for was chronic exertional compartment syndrome that we assumed was brought early on by ballet. However when I received the results for my pressure test it had come back negative. By this point I had stopped almost all exercise, I wasn’t playing any sports, I wasn’t doing any HIIT training, I wasn’t even walking. I began to start feeling slightly depressed and my appointments were weeks apart which left me feeling more hopeless and confused. The next test was for popliteal arterial entrapment syndrome via ultra sound on my legs. I have not received the results for this yet and I won’t for another week. I am going traveling with my boyfriend at the end of this year and it doesn’t look like I will be able to receive surgery before I leave but I wanted to share this because I know there are people out there who are struggling with similar issues(even though I hope that you are not). Injury sucks and feeling left out or held back can hurt but things heal and problems can be fixed. When things can’t be fixed, it can feel like you are stuck but I promise, you are not. I found out this morning that I can skip with a rope and it doesn’t aggravate my calves. It sounds ridiculous but I almost found myself crying out of happiness after not being after to exercise enough to work up a sweat in some time. I weight lifted yesterday at a gym with a few friends and even though my loads were light, I managed leg exercises that didn’t give me pain. Even though I am held back from doing something I love, I’ve found things that I probably wouldn’t have in another situation.
I am so grateful that someone told me what I was feeling wasn’t right and that being in pain is not normal. I never would have guessed that walking didn’t hurt and I am excited for what I might be able to do when I get better. There has definitely been an element of self pity that I’m giving up on, life doesn’t have to end just because I can’t run or walk up hills even if I do live in Auckland City. The journey doesn’t have to suck either, I never would have discovered I loved gaming if I hadn’t had a bad back. If you are in pain or if you have an injury I am sorry, it sucks but you aren’t alone and I hope that while you might feel trapped at the moment, you aren’t. You are awesome, amazing and capable right now, of anything injured or not.
Thank you so much for reading, I hope that you have an awesome day!Read more →
I have a confession, I have an obsession Korean style. You don’t see too much of it in New Zealand because it just simply isn’t the norm. However every now and then I will see a small girl in overalls and a knit jumper and I am star struck. I am certainly not one for exposing a lot of chest and I think that may be one of the reasons I love this style so much. I know in Japan it is extremely rude to wear clothing that is cut low on women’s chests. In what I have experienced that is also somewhat true in Korea. Another reason for my love is the lack of crop tops. In the very few occasions I have worn them all I can think about is how cold my kidneys must be…?(I am rather strange). If you are unfamiliar with the style I have kindly found you some resources below on how, you too can be adorable!
It definitely isn’t easy finding clothing like this that ships to countries like New Zealand but Stylenanda is a site I simply can’t drag myself away from. It is also offered fully in English which makes trying to decipher google translate much more convenient!
If you want to see more of my style preferences you can find them on my Pinterest
One of my new favorite healthy recipes is the vegan corn chowder adapted by the lovely Taylor R. I have been a massive fan of her cooking videos for a while now but only recently have I had the courage to actually try one. I am a complete wimp when it comes to trying new recipes! I’m so glad I tried this one though, not only is it super easy to make but also affordable for someone like me who is on the student budget buzz. All I needed was one ladle in a bowl for dinner and I completely satisfied! I think for me eating warm food in Winter is really important. I never really feel satisfied with a salad for dinner when the weather is cold no matter what the portion.
Eating healthy recently has made me really happy and feeling much more full of energy. I have lost a huge amount of weight in a really short amount of time which has been awesome but I am trying, now to up my calorie intake to make sure the loss is sustainable for the long term. Taylor also did a really interesting post over on her blog about nutrition and her weight loss journey that might interest some of you! Another lifestyle change that I have been considering is changing up how much animal products I am consuming and trying out a vegan lifestyle. It has been a way of living that I have considered for sometime now however I’ve have been reluctant due to the company I work for not aligning with vegan values. I have an appreciation for both ways of thinking and living but at this moment I am still considering the leap for myself so I can hopefully avoid any contractions.
On a separate note I went for an ultra sound today to test for popliteal arterial entrapment syndrome in my legs. It was quite nice to go into a hospital and not have people sticking needles into my legs for once. No diagnosis was made on today and I am not too sure when I will receive the results but I am crossing my fingers for a diagnosis for my pain in the near future! Anyway I hope you are having a lovely Thursday morning and that you are thinking happy thoughts!
Thank you so much for being here again, I love you!Read more →
Today I actually had to leave the house which was extremely inconvenient(I dislike the outside world) however it did give me an excuse to put on something decent. These are my current favorite winter things right now. I am so in love with this bag! It was a custom made Bucket bag for Ruby made by MYDEERFOX and those double tassels are just so damn cute! They are actually available in there stores now which ship internationally if you did want them enough to grab one for yourself. I have been living in these black boots and my gloves. They are pretty intense and I feel they are a bit ‘much’ for most New Zealanders but they are so super cute, today I just couldn’t resist!
Super excited to share one of my new favorite recipes with you as well. I tried out vegan corn chowder which sounds complicated but is actually one of my favorite easy recipes yet! It was so tasty and light while also being filling. One of the things I love about a lot of vegan food is that doesn’t make you feel stodgy or bloated which I often do with with meat based meals. After attending the Huckleberry Farms Darn Good Breakfast event held in Shaky Isles, Britomart I really got to get an insight into the affects of eating meat on the environment. Super excited to start making more meals like this! Hopefully I can get some awesome photos of the dish to share with you tomorrow.
Hope you are all loving the Winter weather or if you’re on the other side of the world, enjoying the Summer. I love you! Thanks for being here xRead more →